Posted in ish-ish

Its my birthday today. Hurray!!!

Being that today is my birthday I have been playing a memory wheel of the past year in my head for the better part of yesterday. It’s amazing how many things can change in 365 days. I have learned so much about myself and  this year, not to mention how important it is to truly keep God 1st in all you do. Psalm 37:4 and Jeremiah 29:11 are my daily scriptures that keep me motivated. And I must say God has been faithful.

 

What I Have Learned:

-I need to slow down and enjoy the moment.

-Be present and put the phone down

with God everything is possible

appreciate simple things in life

– money is not source of happiness

-Plans and people change, get over it.

-People aren’t as though they seem, therefore dust it off and move forward.

29bd2a6fc812d70383ee7e986250d0e0

My Goals For This Year:

-Get dates planned to go to Kenya

-Launching the second part of my vision. ( We will save this for another post)

-Surround myself with people that truly support and understand my madness.

-Not to skip the gym!

Cheers to 27! The Best is yet to come! Now, I must go pack!

talk soon ♥♥♥

img_20161020_193018_871

Advertisements
Posted in inspiring, motivating, personal development

Run Your Own Race

October is almost coming to a close. I know All of us may have different expectations, Yet one thing remains, although God is eager and ready to lead us through, our attitude certainly plays a big role in our fate. Will you be a pessimist who will live life in awareness of what went wrong last month and constantly fear the unknown and expect the worst? Will November only mean a change of a calendar for you or you will get up and fight against all odds? Will you be an optimistic? Will you get into the battlefield and get dirty fighting for your dreams and your purpose as opposed to sitting as a spectator and play critic to those chasing their dreams. Whatever you choose, remember that victory does not belong to the critics or the spectators, but to those who are part of the action, of the game, of the competition, it belongs to those who made an effort.

A friend once told me that life is about running like a horse. Hence,I recently jumped at the opportunity to watch The horse race at Meydan Race course in hope of observing how a horse runs its race.

horse-1
image courtesy of google

Take a moment and think about it, I’m not denying the fact that when a horse is racing it does race against other horses that may even be taller, fitter, faster etc. What is important is that when a horse gets to a race it forgets all these factors about other horses. During the race it does not look back at other horses or turn back to see which horse is behind it or which one has passed by. When a horse is running it only listens to its jockey, follows the track that its jockey directs it on. It does not stop along the way when it takes the last position. It runs diligently until the end. Interesting enough, at the end of the race, none of the horses look defeated. They all walk away with their dignity intact.

 

h2
image courtesy of google

Does the horse that lost the race go to its stable and sulk for the rest of the time? Absolutely not! Does it get jealous, I don’t think so? When trained for another race does it stop trying because it was previously defeated- certainly not! In fact it goes back to try again with a winning attitude and so much energy. What I mean by comparing human beings to horses is that we as human beings need to adapt the same attitude in life. Yes you are always going to have people running the race of life alongside you unless if you relocated to Mars.

Stop looking at what others are doing with their lives, what they have achieved and you haven’t. What they drive, what clothes they wear, what degrees they have or don’t have. This kind of comparison only leads to being discontent, bitter and angry. Other people’s achievements are not yours , celebrate with them genuinely but don’t compare yourself to them, you have your own unique race to run that is different from the next person.
Today the average life span is 25 550 days. don’t waste any of those days sulking over other people’s  talents, achievements , looks etc. Run your own race and listen to your “jockey” who in this case is God. Let Him direct you without you trying to leave your life’s track to copy someone else because you “prefer” that person’s life track.

persistence
image courtesy of google

What if everything you try never works you may ask; I say keep trying, find a different way of doing what you failed in previously, try something completely new, go back to school, start your own business using your God given talents, collect the guts to ask her out, get that much deserved makeover, get an investment policy, start jogging every morning, walk away from toxic relationships, make new friends, find a new hobby, visit a different country, talk less and listen more ….. I could go on for ever but my point is if  you don’t wait for tomorrow, as long as its not a crime just do it! Last year I learnt that timid people wait for so long and hope for the apple to fall off the tree because they fear that climbing the tree is risky and they may fall and get laughed at or get badly hurt, while brave people climb the apple tree and pluck as many apples as they want from the tree.

Be bold in your actions , when you have prayed about something and you have peace in your heart that it is what God is leading you to do, stop over analyzing just go for it! Don’t care what the next person is doing with their life, it is their’s you need to focus on your own life and excel at it! Don’t worry about other people’s opinions about you remember they are entitled to their opinions and you entitled to not give a care what anyone says or thinks about you because people will always talk.  Make this the month where every single week you dare to do something out of the box, of the ordinary and by the end of this year you’ll be surprised how far you would have gone.

opinion
image courtesy of google

If you are unhappy with your job make the decision to leave and find something better and more fulfilling to do, remember you should never work for money, money should work for you! If you don’t like your weight then stop feeling sorry for yourself and do something about it, you don’t like your physical features well get over yourself and work with what you have, after all you are God’s master piece and have His fingerprints all over you. You are beautifully and wonderfully made so don’t bore people with how much you hate your nose, how big your tummy is etc focus on your best features , your abilities , talents and excel in those. This is your year, go grab those opportunities and improve your relationship with others and God in the process.
Take care and keep shining. God loves you.

Posted in procrastination

The Tale of a Procrastinator

Happy new week dream chasers!

I believe we have all been working very hard by being proactive and setting our goals for the fourth quarter of the year. Call me a pessimist, but I suspect some of us may not have done that, due to procrastination.

If you are a student, I can bet you that as long as social media platforms are your favorite way of ‘whiling up time’ then I’m afraid, you may be heading for disaster and chances are you wont complete your studies on record time. In high school my English teacher,used to joke about how towards preparation for final exams its “normal” to suddenly feel like the rose shrubs on your garden need some “trimming” and end up not getting any studying done at all, which proved to be true.
Later on when I went on to my first year in college; if i wasn’t caught busy procrastinating then i was caught busy “attempting” to study without actually getting down to any real studying and it came as no surprise when i had to resit for cost accounting exams all over again & my lesson was learnt.

When you wait until the last possible moment to complete a task it may result in less time to complete the task, therefore elevated stress levels. You may end up rushing to complete that task meaning it won’t be done properly, resulting in failure or mediocrity. Bear in mind that putting off an unimportant task isn’t always procrastination: it may just be good prioritization, as well as putting off an important task for a short period because you’re feeling sick or extremely tired. My point is that if you have a genuine valid reason for rescheduling something important you can be forgiven but if you’re simply “making an excuse” because you really just don’t feel like doing it, then you are indeed procrastinating.

If you’re still procrastinating because you find the task at hand very unpleasant, think about this for a moment –  unless have actually attempted the task ,you may actually be overestimating it’s unpleasantness. Just give it a try and you’ll be surprised to find out that it’s not as unpleasant as you imagined!

I however came up with ways to deal with procrastination 

Step 1: Recognize That You’re Procrastinating 

If you  find yourself in a situation where you wait for the right mood and time to tackle a task, leaving stuff on a to do list for a long time,filling your day with low priority task or simply face booking and endless coffees, is a red flag indicator that you are indeed procrastinating.

Step 2: Work Out Why You’re Procrastinating

These can depend on both you and the task. But it’s important to understand which of the two is relevant in a given situation, in order to select the best approach to help you overcome your reluctance. psychologists have stated fear of success and failure, skill deficits, rebellion, lack of motivation, lack of discipline, failure to prioritize, perfectionism and pure laziness to be some of the possible causes.

Step 3: Adopt Anti-Procrastination Strategies

Procrastination is a habit – a deeply ingrained pattern of behavior. For something to even become a habit, you must have done it consecutively for 21 days!  Therefore you won’t just break it overnight. It comes to reason that to stop the habit you have to persistently stop practicing for twenty-one days after which you will have developed a habit of NOT procrastinating! the strategy that i came up with to help on this is to identify the consequences of not taking the task, change your thinking pattern by freeing yourself from mental barrier to achieve a goal, manage your time well, as it is of essence keep a to do list to identify what you have already covered.

 

I often make use of  Tony Robbins’ Pain and Pleasure Principle –  whereby you hold the unpleasant consequences of NOT doing the work at the front of your mind. Then of the pleasure it will give you, to know that completing the unpleasant task first leaves you with more time to do the things you enjoy the most! For example most people don’t like exercising and eating healthy meaning they associate it with (PAIN) but they must shift their attitudes towards eating healthy and exercising and associate it with the (PLEASURE) of having a healthier, nicer and trim figure and the benefits of being slimmer are for example, being fit and able to confidently strut your stuff in a bikini, feeling more comfortable in your own skin and being generally healthier.

In one of his quotes, Pablo Picasso says;
“Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone”

Talk soon.

Posted in inspiring, personal development

In The Pursuit of Happiness

Last Tuesday, I began the “counting my blessings one by one” in my Gratitude Journal, I’ve seen so much positive changes in my life. I’ve literally started attracting good things into my life.

One of the things I felt i should highlight as a continuation from my previous post on gratitude ; is that gratitude works hand in hand with happiness. To be honest, you cant be grateful if you are unhappy with your life, its not possible! Being happy comes as a result of you choosing to count your blessings one by one , giving life your best shot possible and accepting the things you have no control over. Its a choice of living your life with a “glass being half full as opposed to being half empty” mentality. For you to even begin to live life through those lenses, you have to first make a conscious decision that no one and nothing has the power to control your emotions and therefore no one and nothing has the power to steal your happiness from you.
You see, Hollywood movies, social media posts and reality shows have given us a distorted view of what happiness truly is. They have misled us to believe that money equals happiness but that’s not always true and neither am I suggesting that being poor makes one happy (because i believe there’s no happiness in struggling to make ends meet and trying to hold on to every last cent in your pocket).

In my understanding happiness is not at all aligned with material wealth or lack thereof, BUT its a state of mind and well being of your spirit. That said to be happy one first has to have a healthy spirit. That means being in a place of peace with God, without God the truth is that you will never be truly satisfied even if you acquired all the wealth money can buy. I guess that is why many Hollywood celebrities and reality stars that the world likes to be “Keeping Up With” on tv; they have bank accounts bigger than bank loans should allow, yet their lives seem to be a train wreck in motion and usually over -shadowed by scandals, drugs, divorce, depression, you name it…

I’ve also learn t that if you chase happiness it will elude you , rather you must focus on the good happening in your life and happiness will chase you. HOW?

WAYS TO MAKE YOUR LIFE SIMPLER & HAPPIER

1.    Have a strong personal relationship with God (not just religious routines). From that stance you’ll learn about God’s love and purpose for your life through His Word and personal fellowship with the Holy Spirit. That leads to you trusting God and knowing no matter what happens in your life, God loves you and has a bigger plan than you have for yourself. When you choose to consciously become thankful to God in ALL situations – that is Gratitude. The result is being happy knowing that life has seasons and every storm in your life will pass!

2.     Eliminate ALL negative people and energy from your life, dont feel bad about it. Remember that your accomplishments and progress in life are directly linked to the company you keep. If you hang around with negative people, they will definitely rub it off you making you eventually become discontent and unhappier with your life.

3.     Discover your talents and make an effort no matter how small, to develop them on a daily basis. This will make you happier because since we tend to be naturally good at the things we are talented in.  Therefore it will boost your self esteem and make you get a sense of purpose and accomplishment, resulting in a generally happier you. For instance I discovered I have a passion for writing and hence, the birth of this blog. I feel so good about it and find me with a notebook at every place I go. Even on the toilet seat! And that spices up my life.

4.     Be more organized by the cluttering and planning each and everyday in advance instead of just slumbering awkwardly through the day. This will simplify your life, help you manage your time and therefore decrease unnecessary stress levels.

5.     Count your blessings

6.     Get a regular secret getaway – this should be like your own little sanctuary where you can spend some quiet time alone to reflect, plan, meditate, strategies  without any disturbances. I personally love the serenity of libraries and book stores.

7.     Be kind and generous to someone you have nothing to benefit from- for me that beats them all. Some years ago, I met several incredible people who were so kind to me and gave me opportunities in life I otherwise would have never imagined possible. They had nothing to benefit from me but they still went out of their way to help me against all odds! I’ll never ever forget that. It also inspired me to do the same nomatter how small the act of kindness may seem just do it, it will make you happier

8.     Eat healthy, exercise regularly and get necessary sleep. Remember that too much sleep can easily translate to laziness! Only get necessary sleep to recharge your batteries (about 5-6 hours). Personally, as an upcoming career woman sleep is but a rum our and a luxury.  Too much sleep is for the weak, wake up dude life is passing you by; you’ll sleep enough when you die.

9.     Spend enough time with your loved ones; – never neglect your family and true friends in favor of making money or pursuing your career. Try to balance your life.

10. Continuously learn new things you’ll enjoy – it doesnt have to be classroom related type of learning or getting something major like an MBA. It can be anything that will challenge you and motivate you to look foward each day, like learning how to cook taking dancing lessons, learning a new sport (now this year, I want to learn a new exotic language like French … just keep your mind captivated and you’ll love the results.

Choose to be happy and positive today and you’ll see a big difference in your life.
Senting love and light to you all.

Posted in inspiring

WHAT WENT DOWN AT QATAR AIRWAY CABIN CREW RECRUITMENT NAIROBI KENYA.

ketray akoya

Last sunday, qatar airline made an open call interview for a cabin crew position. The interview was to be held at intercontinental hotel nairobi kenya. Now for the past, a friend of mine johnmark, who works in aviation industry kept telling me to try applying for the cabin crew job coz he believes I have the potential to be one judging by my character. Deep inside I was not for it coz after all I wanted to be an accountant somewhere in nairobi counting monies and auditing companies. I could turn down all the interview alerts that he informed Me in the past years, because I felt that was not my thing and he was just bothering me after all. Sorry to say this johnmark. This time round,
I thought it was a viable opportunity for me to try and toss my dice , going by the fact that the…

View original post 1,249 more words

Posted in motivating

RISING UP AFTER HITTING ROCK BOTTOM.

Have you ever hit rock bottom? Yes, I have and of course there were people waiting eagerly to celebrate my “fall”. Not to be conceited or anything. when I was extrmely young I did exceptionally well generally, anything I set myself to achieve did happen but as the years went by  I watched my world crumble down  in slow motion right before me.

PS: To hit rock bottom means different things to different individuals for others it’s a bitter end of a relationship, failure, injury, death of a loved one, retrenchment etc but for me, it means being at a point in your life when you are not sure if what you are doing and the way your life is heading is right for you.

Literally despite all my good efforts, things have seemed to not go my way, the more I try harder the deeper I sank in a pool of  quiet desperation and misery.

I have been questioning all that I’d ever thought to be right; my viewpoints, principles, qualms, choices and why in the past I didn’t execute certain strong aspirations I had, why I had immersed certain decisions and people into my life. Why I have succeeded in my younger years only to languish latter on in life. At this point the very structure of my life is twisted upside down and I have to review it in unrefined & unbiased facet.  incase you are wondering why I am writting all this, its because pen and paper are less judgmental.

The hardest element of being in this condition of rout is no longer the public humiliation or the pain or fret. Somewhat, the hardest part of that sentiment of trounce is the difficulty I allie with dreaming again and finding a new direction in my career while embracing lessons learnt in the past. I have to find A Beautiful Exchange into the future! 

It is from this position that I assess my life truthfully and became honest with myself. I redirect my energy and focus on the way I truly desire to live my life no matter how trivial it would seem to the onlookers. 

Although, I don’t believe in quitting without finishing my battles in life, I also believe a winner knows when to walk away with her dignity still intact. As God would have it, he worked in more mysterious ways just to push me out of some situation. And So I finally take a new lease of life, to evaluate who I am and what I truly want in life.

On a lighter note, some of the benefits of my life retreat have been:

 Finding out who my true friends are.

Discovering my true purpose and passion in life and having the courage to pursue them.

Setting new challenging goals that are the true essence of the human spirit that is me.

Embracing humility before God & people while being grateful for everything i have.

Refueling my energy on my passion of writing , hence the birth of this blog.

The 10 lessons I learnt by being in rock bottom;

1.       Money should never be a determining factor in my decisions ;its only a means of life.
2.      Making a living and making a life are completely different things and I choose the latter.
3.      Not to be narrow-minded but to open my eyes new opportunities in my career.
4.      Hitting rock bottom is the best place because from there I can’t go any lower the only way out is up! From the ground I  looked up with a fresh perception based on my rehabilitated sense of precision smiled at all the opportunities awaiting me to begin again.
5.      The best is yet to come, rock bottom only means I was headed the wrong direction & I needed to review my life understanding that I shouldn’t just settle for being good when I can be GREAT!
6.      Not to be hard on myself, even successful people we know today had to reach rock bottom at some point before finding their true purpose for instance author of Harry Potter books – J.K Rowling.
7.      I needed to understand my problem and figure my way out before climbing out of rock bottom
8.     I MUST get back up!Staying down is not an option BUT I should take baby steps and not bite more than I can chew in the name of “compensating for lost time”
9.      I learnt to let go of the past and as I emptied my cup, I’ve been able to refill it with substance that I truly yearn for instead of being compliant with what was unconsciously passed onto me by my previous state of affairs.
10.  When my world crumbles down, when mountains fall I’ll forever stand on my Rock of Ages – JESUS CHRIST.

That said, I don’t know what your rock bottom is or was. Maybe you took a leap of faith and hoped the results would be stunning but the wings you had hoped would emerge on the way down never grew and you fell painfully and hard on your face. My advice is forget the time you “wasted”. God works out all things for good and no experience is in vain. what you learnt in the past will somehow be vital in your future so do not despise it. Don’t sit idle and feel sorry for yourself. THIS IS YOUR LIFE, OWN IT!

In order to dream again, set your priorities in order. Otherwise you’ll be making the same mistakes but hoping for a change. If you decided to go back to school after failing, ask yourself what is more important to you, money or an all round fulfilling life. Would you rather be a rich CEO who hates his or her job with a passion or a wedding planner who doesn’t get paid as much but is very passionate about her job.  Would you rather work for someone or become an entrepreneur. Ask yourself what career you would rather spend your life doing if money were not any issue, then do it diligently and you’ll be surprised how much money you’ll make.  

Is it swimming, working with children, acting, farming, riding horses, playing football, baking, sewing, traveling, poetry etc. I don’t know but what ever it is; you must believe in yourself, in your tenacity & aptitude to make your dreams an actuality. There are no effortless methods to reclaim your self-assurance. Nevertheless, there are ways you can seize to restore yourself and future. The goal is to NOT help haters by also criticizing yourself or settling. This is a new beginning so let go of the past to make way for future which is indeed  a chance for A Beautiful exchange!

Posted in inspiring

BE KIND TO YOURSELF.

Hello dream-chasers!
We have just come to the end of easter celebrations and to me, it was an exceptional one, considering the fact that I got to understand in deeper, the meaning of “old rugged cross” and the frustrations, shame and pain one underwent through while on that rugged cross. I tell you the roman government was worse than the icc. I know some churches have comprehensively covered the story of jesus. That is, the events that went on from the time of his triumphant entry into Jerusalem upto his crusifiction. Jesus crusifiction is one that leaves me with a tonned heart, especially from the description of how the “old rugged cross” was. Now through the study, You may have heard of a desciple, simon peter.

He used to brag about his love for Jesus and even promised Jesus that he will never deny him but will always follow Him. later on Peter denied Jesus 3 times! Events that followed left Jesus crucified and he died a shameful death on the cross.

PAUSE: For a moment I want you to put yourself in Peter’s boots. Imagine how terrible he must have felt that night! He must have been ashamed of himself and thought he deserved some form of severe punishment. What he did was really not cool especially considering how much Jesus had loved and believed in him. When Jesus called him, he used to be a struggling fisherman, before he knew it, Jesus turned his life around, soon he became famous in Israel and one day he even found himself walking on water, healing the sick etc yet when tables turned around and Jesus needed his support,  he blatantly denied him three times.

Well, You may think this has nothing to do with you and me but it does. Whatever you did that you can’t forgive yourself can’t be any worse than denying the Son of God not once but three times! You’d expect that when Jesus resurrected, He would have ostracized Peter and given him a one way ticket to hell. Yet when Jesus resurrected the very first person He asked for was Peter! Jesus later on told Peter that He was the rock on which The Church would be built on. The lesson I learnt from Peter’s situation was that no matter how hard I have messed up God WILL forgive me, all I need to do is to ask Him for forgiveness because Jesus paid the price.

We’ve all done embarrassing things, made pesky mistakes even monumental ones that led to a tragedy or disaster of some sort. Mistakes are inevitable. You may have invested your life’s savings to start a business that failed terribly and left you broke to the last cent. You may feel like you wasted your entire twenties in between trivial jobs that offered you no growth and you regret that at over 30 years you still haven’t built a solid career. 

Maybe you spent years kissing “a frog” that never turned into a prince but instead the “frog” left you as a single mother, HIV positive or simply wasted your time and then went on to marry someone else. You may have aspired to be a doctor, an engineer, ballerina queen yet you’ve found yourself stuck in a cubicle doing some trivial job you really dislike.
You may have been raped, abused, abandoned, deceived and hurt, Or past experiences may have destroyed all your self-esteem and left you feeling unworthy, dirty, undeserving of love, cheap, unattractive, a loser, a failure and whatever else you imagine yourself to be.

PAUSE:  First of all avoid blaming others but rather take responsibility for anything that you could have better handled. Then, I want to encourage you not to judge yourself too harshly. This is very vital because I’ve learnt that as human beings things will not always go the way we planned. As long as you are alive you’ll be rejected, disappointed, you’ll fail, make mistakes, disappoint others, be hurt or hurt others etc. That’s what life is about. It’s a journey and every setback, mistake or curve is a learning experience. As long as you are still alive you have an opportunity to improve one step at a time.  

If you only knew all the skeletons in people’s closets, you’d realize that no one is perfect and you wont be too harsh on yourself. You really need to stop dwelling on the past and focus on the present and embark on opportunities that await you. Memories have a way of sticking in our minds, tormenting us and crippling us with fear and stagnation. Jesus paid the price for our mistakes and therefore if God forgives you, why can’t YOU forgive yourself? FORGIVE YOURSELF and realize that the outcome of your mistakes was never your intention.

Yes you messed up big time but be kind to yourself! Don’t beat yourself up over things that went wrong, just pull yourself together and get on with life already. Everything happens for a reason. Some of the worst events eventually turn out to be the most amazing, positive turning points in our lives even if they are not what you would have initially preferred. One day you’ll realize that you wouldn’t have been able to get to the place you desired if you hadn’t gone through what was initially a horrible and unbearable thing.

You are worth it! You don’t need to constantly play that horrible experience in your mind like a broken record because it is only in the present moment that we can actually make a difference. The past is long gone and too much time wasted in reliving the past can be detrimental to our present .Start afresh, renew your mind, forgive yourself because it’s not the end of the world and God will certainly work out all things for good for those that love him. You won’t achieve anything by going over your past mistakes with a fine comb.

Remember if it didn’t kill you, then it will make you stronger.

Be kind to yourself.

Talk soon.
Follow me on twitter (@ketryakoya)